Why You Feel Disconnected in Motherhood (and How to Start Reconnecting With Yourself)

You love your kids more than anything. But sometimes, in the middle of the school run, work deadlines, and the never-ending to-do list, you catch yourself wondering ‘what about me?’

You used to know what lit you up. You had hobbies, dreams, and space to breathe. Now it feels like your whole identity is wrapped up in being “mum”, and while you wouldn’t change having your children for the world, you quietly miss who you were before. 

If that resonates, just know that you’re not selfish. You’re simply experiencing something almost every working mum goes through… feeling disconnected from yourself.

But, you can begin to reconnect.

Why Mums Lose Themselves in Motherhood

Motherhood changes everything, your body, your time, your relationships, your priorities. It’s not just adding a role, it’s a full identity shift.

Add to that the pressure society piles on mums:

• Be available 24/7.
• Sacrifice your own needs without complaint.
• Carry the invisible mental load of running a family.
• Look good while doing it.

No wonder you feel like you’ve lost your identity. When you’re constantly giving to everyone else, your own needs get pushed to the bottom of the pile. Until one day, you hardly recognise yourself.

The Impact of Feeling Disconnected

Losing touch with yourself doesn’t happen all at once. It’s a slow drip. And it often shows up like this:

• You can’t remember the last time you did something purely because it made you happy.
• You feel guilty whenever you even think about taking time for yourself.
• You’ve forgotten what lights you up outside of work and family.
• Life feels more like “getting through the day” than truly living it.

This isn’t a sign you’re ungrateful or not coping “well enough.” It’s a sign you’re carrying too much without enough space for you.

How to Start Reconnecting With Yourself

The beautiful thing is that you don’t need to make huge changes to start feeling more like yourself again. Small, intentional steps make the biggest difference.

1. Give Yourself Permission

Your needs matter too. Taking even ten minutes for yourself isn’t selfish, it’s necessary.

2. Start Small

Bring back one thing you used to love, in a small way. Music, reading, a walk, painting… even five minutes counts.

3. Check In With Yourself Daily

Ask: “What do I need today?” It might be rest, connection, or space. Listening to yourself is the first step to honoring your needs.

4. Create Micro-Moments of Joy

Joy doesn’t only live in big holidays or days off. It’s in a hot coffee, dancing in the kitchen, or laughing with your child. Look for the little things that light you up.

You Haven’t Disappeared

Here’s what I want you to know, you haven’t lost yourself completely. The real you is still there, under the routines, the responsibilities, and the noise.

Reconnection isn’t about going back to who you were before kids. It’s about meeting yourself here, now, and giving yourself permission to take up space again.

Because when you feel more like you, everything else feels lighter and that ripples out to everyone around you.

Your First Step to Reconnection

If you’re ready to start feeling like yourself again, I’ve created something just for you: “The Calm Within the Chaos: The 12-Minute Reset Every Working Mum Needs.”

This free guide will help you:

• Reconnect with yourself in just 12 minutes a day.
• Calm your nervous system, even on the busiest days.
• Take the first step toward feeling more like YOU again.

👉 Click here to download your free guide now

Because you deserve to feel supported, not stuck in survival mode.