The Hidden Grief of Motherhood

There’s a part of motherhood that doesn’t get talked about very often.

Alongside the love, joy, and pride many mothers feel, there can also be grief. Grief for the life you had before. Grief for parts of your identity, your freedom, your career aspirations, or even the relationships that quietly shift after becoming a parent.

But because motherhood is supposed to be “the happiest time,” many women feel guilty admitting those feelings.

That’s exactly what I explore in this episode of The Mum Poster Syndrome Podcast with Nicole Foulkes, host of the Squiggly Motherhood podcast.

Loving Your Children and Missing Your Old Life

One of the most powerful parts of this conversation is the reminder that love and grief can exist at the same time.

You can adore your children and still miss aspects of your previous life. You can feel grateful for motherhood and still struggle with the loss of identity, career momentum, friendships, or personal freedom.

These feelings don’t make you ungrateful. They make you human.

Nicole and I also talk about how birth experiences, returning to work after maternity leave, and unrealistic cultural expectations can intensify these emotions.

When Identity and Relationships Shift

Motherhood often brings unexpected changes to friendships, careers, and relationships. Some connections deepen, while others fade, and many women find themselves questioning who they are now in this new phase of life.

These shifts can feel confusing and isolating, especially when everyone around you seems to be coping effortlessly.

Recognising that these transitions are a normal part of becoming a mother can help remove some of the pressure to have everything figured out.

Why Talking About It Matters

When these experiences stay hidden, women often assume they’re the only ones feeling this way.

But the truth is that many mothers navigate a quiet grief during this transition, and acknowledging it is often the first step toward acceptance and healing.

💛 Free Support for Overwhelmed Working Mums
If your nervous system feels constantly “on” and life feels like one long to-do list, start here:
👉 The 12-Minute Reset Every Working Mum Needs

🎧 Listen to the full episode:
The Hidden Grief of Motherhood with Nicole Foulkes
Available now on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.